Some random thoughts that occur to me this morning after Nikki and I decided to suddenly start exercising this weekend after a rather long break from anything resembling exercise.

• After apparently laying about like a gelatinous slug for the past millennia, muscles actually atrophy to the point where my body actually has to re-evolve the ability to have muscles.  It doesn’t like that, forced evolution of muscle in the span of a few hours hurts like a mother.  My splendidly-muscled laptop typing fingers excepted, of course.  My glide-pad finger has a six-pack.
• I no longer have legs, I have pain-sticks upon which I totter about like a drunken circus clown on stilts, unfortunately afflicted with Tourette’s.
• Sneezing has turned into an explosive shout-bark, especially hilarious in the middle of allergy season.
• My recent habit of camping in a Starbucks to work when I am not at a client’s site is now some form of purgatory since sitting on a wooden chair on my recently punished glutes is agony.
• The older I get, the more intense this period of “discomfort” is after re-starting exercise.  I thought we were pretty sensible about what exercise we did, taking it relatively easy.  It now seems likely that while I was asleep on the weekend I was drugged and beaten with sticks by a whole rugby team as I lay in bed.  There is no other explanation that makes sense.

The sad thing is the horrible horrible realization that I have to actually exercise again soon, or this will all be for nothing.