Got fuel to burn, got roads to drive.

In the automotive vein, a very good read on ethanol and how it might change the world for the better. The interesting part is how Brazil is so far ahead of the rest of the world with this stuff. The environmental gains are difficult to measure (but certainly exist), but the economic ones are eye-popping:

Ethanol’s rise has had far-reaching effects on the economy. Not only does Brazil no longer have to import oil but an estimated $69 billion that would have gone to the Middle East or elsewhere has stayed in the country…

Now that’s some scratch. Brazil has a population of 186,112,794 (thanks to Google), so compared to Canada, there’s a difference for sure. But still. Ethanol sells for 45% of the price of gasoline in Brazil. If you have to drive, you would definitely pick the cheap fuel, and since it’s so much better than gas, emission-wise, it’s all good. Wilson and I talked about bio-diesel just this morning, so here’s another alternative.

Pretty cool stuff.

BRING ON THE APOCOLYPSE, BABY!

I was just reading more damning evidence that we’re on the highway to climate
hell. Predictably my blood started to boil.

It really is the beginning of the end. By all scientific accounts,
the polar ice caps will be gone within the next hundred or so years.
Temperatures will have risen several degrees in the same time. With all that
extra water the oceans are predicted to rise up to 20 feet (depending on the
article you read). This will dramatically reduce our landmasses, further
crowding us inland. Add on top of this that a lot of the remaining land will
be uninhabitable due to the risen heat and the constant scouring by never
before seen titanic storms, hurricanes and tornadoes. A lot of already
over-crowded countries won’t have enough room for their people. This
will initiate countless wars of “national survival”, which will actually be good
news because it will eliminate much of the overcrowding through war related
fatalities. But, then, wham! Hey! Where did all our fresh water go??? You
mean it doesn’t magically appear from some mystical fountain? Nope. Sorry
’bout your luck. 77% of surface freshwater is stored as ice and 22% as
groundwater and soil moisture. The remaining freshwater, making up less than
1% of the world total, is contained in lakes, rivers and wetlands. And what
do you think replenishes those lakes, rivers, underground aquifers that we
rely on so? Yep, ice cap runoff. Oh, rain does it too thankfully. Oh, but
we’ve f**ked that up too with acid rain. So we just melted our major source
of fresh water which is now nicely salinated in the oceans and are, ever so
busily, poisoning the rest. So, as the rivers, lakes and aquifers deplete, the
toxic chemicals will further concentrate. Unlike water, which can go away and
not come back, the chemicals tend to want to overstay their welcome. Where do
you think that leaves the land? Poisoned. Infertile. Dead.

So, after thinking about the previous scenario, I’m starting to change
my mind about the whole stopping green-house gas issue. Maybe I’ve
been looking at this the wrong way. Maybe, I’m going to start siding with the
oil companies and maybe our next vehicle will be a big, square, cast iron
vehicle that has to haul around a trailer with an extra enormous fuel tank
because it gets 0.2 km/litre. Better yet, lets lobby the auto industry to develop
a vehicle that runs directly on a gelatinous slurry of local puréed flora and
fauna. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

The way I’m starting to see it is thus: We’re never going to clean our act up
enough to save ourselves. It’s just too late for that. Humans as a whole
have been too cursed with a deadly mixture of intelligence, a supreme lack of
wisdom/foresight, and an unhealthy dose of complacency to set this all right.
This couldn’t be more apparent in our leaders. The world is ruled by a
bunch of retards who couldn’t pull their collective heads out of their collective
asses long enough to be aware of the world they’re supposedly responsible for.
That and they all, 100% of them, care for only one thing: the economy.
How much mental effort does it take to come up with the simple logic that
without a world in which to live, money doesn’t really do anyone any
good. But, you might as well tell people the oceans are red. Oh, wait!
They ARE (red tide)! Or that the skies are green.ummm, yep, it more and more
looks pretty greeny/grey with P.A.N.’s (Peroxy Acetyl Nitrates) which are just
one element of the chemical stew we vomit into the atmosphere on a daily basis.

And don’t get me started on illness. Where do you think most of our illnesses come
from? Alot of it, maybe MOST of it is self inflicted. That’s why I only, ONLY donate
to environmental charities. Lets fix the cause of the problem not put a bandaid on it.

Yep, I’ve concluded that we’re a species that was not meant to survive long in
the evolutionary scheme of things. We’re inherently murderous, rapacious and
egocentrically driven to exploit every natural resources purely for profit and without
any thought to consequence. The ubiquitous comparisons between humans
and cancer or viruses are extremely apt. We move into an area, use every
resource available until there’s nothing left and then move on to the next area.
In fact, there is little we do as humans that doesn’t involve destroying something.

With that in mind, I’ve pretty much decided to be anti-environmental. The sooner our
species is wiped off the face of the planet, or at least wiped out to the
point where we can’t hurt anything anymore, the better. Our tenure on earth
has been one unmitigated natural disaster since we started. We’ve ravaged,
raped or murdered almost everything there is that’s beautiful on the planet. I think
we’ve proven ourselves time and again manifestly unworthy to hold the top
seat on earth. Lets just get it over with. I’m sure with us gone, the environment will
recover fully in time. Maybe if we kill ourselves quickly enough some other
wiser, more intelligent life form will take over with better success…maybe
the dolphins will get it right.

Happy Armageddon, everyone!

P.S. I’m, of course, just kidding about becoming anti-environmental. I’m
just gonna become more rabid about it, and less humanitarian.

Turncoat Scientists produce rodent super soldier

This isn’t good, people.

For some reason a bunch of scientists are working for the “other side” and have created a race of practically indestructible rodents. I don’t know who turned these guys against us, but boy is this going to be a problem. Apparently these mice can regrow just about anything you cut off them, and heal most of their organs with little or no scar tissue.

Oh, yes it’s a miracle. Wonderful. I’m sure you will be just thrilled about it when they have overthrown and enslaved us all and start doing tests on us and are puzzled when our limbs don’t grow back like theirs.

It could happen.

Holy Crap

Man, did you see this one? This is really creepy stuff.

They have finally managed to photograph one of these giant squids in the water, and it’s a big ‘un. They estimate it was 26 feet long after wrestling with it for a few minutes and getting away with a tentacle to show the boys back at the lab. It’s not the biggest on record (59 feet), but it’s still a little too big for comfort.

That’s pretty freaking unsettling if you ask me.

But, not as unsettling as the thought of even bigger squids, with ‘tude. That’s attitude, for the non-urbanites out there. Some further research (oh I worked hard on this people, it’s on the same website as the link above) turned up this article that talks of “colossal squid” that have hooked tentacles and a huge beaked mouth and prey on the pleasure craft of the rich. Ok, I made that last part up, and they may not be all that dangerous, but it’s still pretty freaking cool to think about these real life sea monsters.

Nifty Octopus video

I’m not sure what side these octopus guys are working on, but I must say that the video is worth installing that evil evil RealPlayer for. Whatever you do, don’t let RealPlayer steal all of your file associations. I really hate those guys.

But I digress.

The octopus in this video isn’t nearly as lovable as the last one I mentioned, in fact he’s big and rather bloodthirsty. However, it seems that he is on our side this time, since he takes on a shark. It’s incredible.

It’s kind of weird to notice that I have mentioned octopi two different times already. You may read more into that than I actually am prepared to admit. I mean just because there are two separate octopus stories here doesn’t mean that I think they are our evil tentacled masters lying in the deep. Not at all. And the resemblance to the Flying Spaghetti Monster is purely coincidental. I don’t actually think that octopi are the FSM equivalent of devils or anything. Not at all. That’s purely a hypothesis, really.

Ramen.

Is this the rise of Zombie Lassie?

Who are these scientists working for anyway? Which side are they on?

They have successfully resurrected a dog…. from the dead of course. It’s a chilling procedure (badabing!) in which the dog’s blood is replaced by a frosty saline solution. The dog then kicks the bucket. Then after several hours, they pump the poor bugger full of blood again, shock his heart and he’s back. Not very dog-friendly, sure, but apparently the dogs are none the wiser after their ordeal. They just chase sticks, run around, devour human brains and scratch themselves like always.

The Register link – funny