A Portland, Oregon man was told his abdominal pain was because he was pregnant when he went to the hospital.  The 71 year old lumberjack and mechanic was overjoyed at the news and immediately rushed off to register for the shower gifts at Sears.

In other news, alarmed by her rapid weight gain, and swelling belly, an unnamed Oregon woman has started exercising more and more.  Feeling nauseous every morning is just part of the “breaking in” period and will pass once she hits her stride at the gym.  Similarly, the movement she feels inside her abdomen is just gas from eating better and she has started taking larger and larger doses of antacids to counter those side effects.

“Eight or 9 more months of this, and I will be in wicked shape for the beach.” the perspiring woman was quoted as saying, having a post workout snack of a pickle, Pringle and salami sandwich.  “Just gotta get the appetite under control, is all.  You got any ice cream?”

Thanks for the tip on that interesting human interest article, Rod.