Wasn’t this the plot for “The Whole Nine Yards”?

Well, except for the cheese.

A woman, obviously not too sharp, (that’s a cheese joke) thought a block of cheese was cocaine and tried to hire a hit man to kill the owners of the loot. (Un)fortunately she ended up hiring an undercover cop to do the job and now she’s in jail. You could say she wasn’t very gouda at crime. She ended up with jack.

That’s all I’ve got right now.

Woman Allegedly Hires Hit Man for Cheese