Did you know that every human on the planet actually collapses and becomes inert, rarely moving for hours at a time every day?  It’s not just you.  Our metabolism slows, we can’t do anything useful and we are generally unresponsive to external stimuli.  By all accounts this epidemic has raged for as long as we have written history, and maybe even longer.

Fortunately, we have science to save us from this horrible horrible condition.  Apparently they have finally developed a drug that keeps you awake when you snort it, and it’s not cocaine.  There’s no apparent side effects, apart from the uncontrollable feeling of smugness that comes from not needing to sleep.  Thank heavens.  The only downside is they will only give it to monkeys so far.  Damn smug monkeys, they always get the best stuff.

Have a read for yourself.